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“I have good news and bad news,” the young woman said, and I had to smile at that alone. I think I’ve found the perfect 2020 line.

I don’t know if there’s an original source for this cliché, or if it’s just an obvious way to describe the dichotomy of everyday existence, and I’ve decided I don’t care. I’m that way now.

The young woman was fictional, by the way, played by Anna Kendrick in a show called “Love Life” (HBO Max). I had no business watching it, but I don’t care about that, either. It’s about young people navigating New York and romance, neither of which I...